


it hurts when you cry

by viraseii



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, M/M, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-04
Updated: 2017-11-04
Packaged: 2019-01-29 07:30:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12626151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/viraseii/pseuds/viraseii
Summary: Soulmate au where you can feel your soulmate's pain





	it hurts when you cry

**Author's Note:**

> Hi I wrote this in an hour and I didn't proofread shit

Lance feels really bad for his soulmate. He's been told that the emotional pain part of it had always been a myth, or that you only feel your soulmate's emotional pain if it's really intense. Given that emotional pain can cause physical stress on your heart, yada yada yada -

The point is? His soulmate is suffering.

At first his parents think he may have chronic depression. They take him to see a therapist for a few weeks, but it's really fruitless because the only cause he can identify is the soulmate connection, which his therapist writes off as a coping mechanism to avoid dealing with actual trauma.

His parents decide it isn't really worth the money and instead focus on pampering him at home. Lance makes sure the worst he ever gets hurt is a stubbed toe here and there, because honestly he doesn't want his soulmate to feel any more pain.

The day they get news about the Kerberos mission is the day Lance gets a clue about who his soulmate may be - that bone-crushing grief and anger he feels definitely isn't his, so it's his soulmate's, right?

And the news isn't public yet, so he knows it's some girl from the Garrison. It brightens his day to know she's so close even as he's clutching himself in the bathroom, Hunk patting his back and rubbing it soothingly as he throws up again and again and again.

Lance doesn't fully understand all the pain and confusion his soulmate feels after that. But he really feels bad for them.

* * *

Keith is honestly not even sure he has a soulmate. Because he's never felt anything from them, and he keeps waiting but eventually he comes to terms with the fact that maybe love just isn't in the cards for him.

It keeps him up at night sometimes. He just wants one person. One person who won't leave him, intentionally or not - just one person.

Other people at the Garrison have a person. Other people have four persons. Some people are friends with the entire class - except him.

Because he guesses just that one person is too much to ask for.

He keeps this mindset until he's celebrating with the Arusians and there's a sudden excruciating fire blazing through his back. He almost screams, but no noise comes out of his mouth as he falls to the floor - hunk doesn't notice, startled by how the lights have gone out and everything has shut down, resulting in an almost immediate drop in temperature.

Not that Keith feels it. He feels like writhing in pain, because he swears his armor is burning through his spine, but then the lull toward sleep hits - and then it's fine, it's gone, and he's struck with the sudden realization that it was his _soulmate._

He almost passed out himself when he runs into the room and finds Lance, skin burned and charred, red and irritated, scratched up. His eyes are squeezed shut but Keith doesn't feel anything, meaning he's not in any pain - meaning he's unconscious. Very much so.

His breathing is coming out in quick pulses, rapid and panicky as he realizes that he might have just lost his soulmate only seconds after figuring out who it is.

He rushes to Lance after Sendak is defeated, kneeling down and offering him a gentle hand, wincing with every movement because Lance is awake which means Lance is in pain which means Keith is in pain.

But the smile is genuine. Lance will be okay.

Until Lance flirts with Allura.

Until Keith realizes Lance doesn't even remember.

Until Keith realizes that he finally found his One Person and his One Person hates his guts.

* * *

Lance feels something funny in his chest when he shakes his head and admits he doesn't remember whatever Keith's going on and on about. Something like betrayal, but he doesn't spend nearly enough time on it like he should.

He's curious at the nightmares he gets, though, because it's the same excruciating pain of the explosion melting pure pain and heat into his body, but he's drinking nunvil with Hunk when it happens, and not running toward Coran with only the single thought screaming through his brain - to _protect_ him.

He doesn't figure it out later, either, although he's a little bit preoccupied with trying not to die to care much about the bruises that appear over his side, his arms, the pain in every inhale. He's too busy shrieking at Keith to open he airlock to care that he's feeling some soulmate pain.

He hasn't actually thought about his soulmate in a long time, if he's being honest.

Too busy trying not to die, like he said.

But then later it clicks. In the dead of night when he can't sleep, when he's replaying Keith's voice inside his head - _I had a robot trying to kill me!_ \- when he winces because it feels like fingers are prodding at sensitive skin even though his body is clean, even though there's nothing there.

It clicks.

And he sort of goes into denial because - ... because he's ... not gay? Because that's not a relationship he wants, not a relationship he's ever even _considered_ wanting. Sure, he supports it, but it's not. It's not him.

He doesn't realize how worried he is for Keith until Keith's out of sight. Until he's stewing in his seat at the Castle for two days straight, sleepless, just watching the blue star on the display, trying not to break down into tears as pain spreads across his entire body. He almost cries out when it feels like there's a sword slicing through his shoulder, but he bites down on his lips instead, and then winces because Keith's going through so much and here Lance is providing him with lip pain on top of all that.

It gives him time for some serious self-reflection.

It gives him time to come to terms with the fact that he may, actually, be a little gay.

Because god, he remembers suffering while growing up, remembers the never ending heartbreak for reasons he just doesn't _know._ Remembers crying late at night and remembers swearing he's going to shower this girl in love as soon as he finds her. So why does he care that it's a boy? Why does that matter - his feelings are the same! And yeah, it's Keith, but shouldn't that just make him feel worse for hating the guy so much without knowing anything about the guy?

He stubbornly choked his tears back as the pain keeps growing and growing until it ends abruptly, leaving Lance confused and somehow even more horrified and concerned.

"The Red Lion is moving."

"We gotta get down there!" He almost sobs out the words, his stomach twisting sickly with fear.

* * *

Lance is looking at Keith strangely when he returns from the Marmora base. He forces himself to walk normally despite the excruciating pain in every joint, the slick drop of blood down his shoulder under his armor.

He knows what Lance has been feeling.

But he also knows Lance doesn't know it's Keith's pain he's feeling.

So as much as Keith wants to break down in Lance's arms and let him hold him...

He still can't. He still doesn't have his One Person.

So he just lets the grief of it all crush his heart as he slowly explains what happened on the base. Leaves out the details.

But Lance is still watching him strangely.

* * *

Lance knows Keith isn't asleep because he's in pain and it's keeping him up. He loses patience eventually, stumbling over to Keith's room, tears rolling down his face as the door slides open for him to reveal a shirtless Keith, stretching his muscles, shoulder bandaged.

"Stop," he rasps out. "Please, it hurts."

Keith turns to face him with utter shock on his face, but Lance just steps into the room so the doors can close behind him.

"Let's just sleep," he sobs.

* * *

Lance kisses him. Lays him down on his bed and gently lowers the blanket over the two of them, carefully rubbing a hand up and down the places Keith isn't bruised or cut, kissing softly per the places he is. And eventually, finally, kisses his lips and whispers, "I'm sorry for biting them earlier today."

It pushes Keith to tears. "I didnt know you knew..."

"Keith," Lance interrupts. "You've been in pain your whole life. Of course I could tell. But you don't have to be, Keith. Please. Please stop letting yourself get hurt like it means nothing in the grand scheme of things."

"But it doesn't-"

"It means something to me," Lance says. "I don't want you to hurt anymore, Keith."

Keith lets his eyes close as Lance kisses over his eyelids.

* * *

Lance makes sure Keith's fully healed before they continue with their attack on Zarkon. Makes up fifty excuses to delay it - but Keith's not hurt enough to go in a pod but not well enough to fight at his full strength. Not to mention he deserves anything but more pain, more danger, so Lance helps him as best he can.

"So... you're. You're staying?" Keith asks him eventually.

"Staying?"

"You won't leave me?"

Lance pulls him closer in the dark. "Never."

* * *

"Asshole!" Keith sobs, body curled over Lance's fragile frame. "Stay awake! You promised you wouldn't leave!"

And it's that grief again - the same kind Lance's has been feeling from Keith since childhood but magnified a thousand times for some reason. So he chuckles. He can hardly feel the hole in his stomach anymore - all sense is flittering out of his mind. Only one coherent thought remains - the acknowledgement that Keith is hurting again, and that - that's not right.

"Keith," he chuckles. "Smile. Please don't cry." He lets his eyes fall shut. "It hurts when you cry..."

But Keith doesn't smile.

He screams.

And then there's just static.


End file.
